On a business trip to the Orient, Joe decided to spend his last night having wild sex with a Geisha Girl.
Upon returning home three weeks later he noticed a very weird green festering sore growing on his Penis.
He went to the doctor, Dr. Jones, who after hearing of his Orient trip and extracurricular activities told him he had Hong Kong Dongand the only cure was complete amputation. Joe was horrified and decided to get a second opinion.
Joe contacted Dr. Smith and showed him the green growth. Dr. Smith said "I am sorry but Dr. Jones is correct. We must amputate right away."
Joe could not accept this. His friend suggested that he visit an oriental doctor. They must deal with this all the time. He went to Dr. Chu Wong.
Dr. Wong agreeed with the diagnosis of Hong Kong Dong but said "These Amadican Doctors--so quick to Chop Chop Chop" Amputation not necessally."
Joe was relieved. Then Dr. Wong said "You wait three weeks and it fall off on its own"
Welcome to the Insane Asylum Of Hysteria. After a long break, I finally found enough spare time to put this together. We have a party coming up in Nashville on Saturday March 24th. Details are in this post For time sake I cut out all the upcoming DVD, CD, Movie release information etc. Here are some of my favorite jokes of the past week as well as Status Messages That You Might Have Missed In The Last Few Days......
An exhausted looking Paris Hilton dragged herself into the doctor's office. "Doctor there are dogs all over my neighborhood. They bark all day and all night and I can't get a wink of sleep"
"I have good news for you" the doctor answered, rummaging through a drawer full of sample medications
"Here are some new sleeping pills that work like a dream. A few of these and your troubles will be over"
"Great!" Paris answered "I'll try anything. Let's give it a shot!"
A few weeks later she returned looking worse than ever "Doc your plan is no good. I'm more tired than before!"
"I don't understand how that could be" said the doctor shaking his head "Those are the strongest pills on the market!"
"That may be true" answered Ms. Hilton wearily "but I'm still up all night chasing those dogs and when I finally catch one, it's hard getting him to swallow the pill!"
Did you know we have a blogspot? Yep and I'm updating it on a regular basis with videos and audio featuring music you might hear at our parties and funny videos too. On the side is the calendar of events and we've even got a chat room that we'll utilize in the near future....So go check out the sex talk video as well as turn up the volume on the lastest posted music videos including My Darkest Days new song Casual Sex http://alternationx.blogspot.com
Jokes From The Phone
What's the difference between a panty and a stage curtain?
When you pull down the stage curtain the show is over. But when you pull down a panty the show begins!!
What's is the definition of a "successful hunting trip?"
When three men kill9 cases of Budweiser in two days.
If Tarzan and Jane were from Grundy County, what would Cheetah be?
Pregnant
Why is sex like pot?
The quality depends on the pusher
A man goes to his psychiatrist complaining about marriage problems. The shrink asks him "Do you tak to your wife during sex?"
"Sure" says the guy "I've got a cell phone!"
Are you on swinglifestyle? So are we! We've actually started a group up for those that we've talked to, emailed etc. If you have a profile on sls and you log on regularly, send us your screen name and we'll send you an invite to the group and also certify your profile if you've been to a party or we've met you outside of parties
Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse running his hands up and down the horse's legs and rump and chest
After a few minutes, Johnny asked "Dad why are you doing that?"
His father replied "Because when I'm buying horses, I have to make sure that they are helathy and in good shape before I buy"
Johnny looking worried said "Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom!"
Jen's bringing back the Girls Night Out. Friday Night March 3rd will be the first Girls Night Out event of the year. If you are of the female gender and would like to take advantage of this night away from the guys, email j.jones7763@yahoo.com for the details. Ladies only Friday night March 3rd Murfreesboro TN
Top 5 Status Messages You May Have Missed This Week.
1. It's been a week since Whitney died. She must really stink.
2. My wife has asked that I stop referring to our kids as "Keeper" and "Wait and See"
3. If knowledge is power and there's strength in numbers than why do so many math nerds get beat up?
4. Whitney Houston won an impressive 6 Grammys in 14 years. Less impressive was her recent attempt at 6 grams in 14 minutes.
5. YOU CAN'T GET FIRED FOR MASTURBATING IN A GROCERY STORE IF YOU DON'T WORK THERE!
A rude New Yorker and his girlfriend were driving across the desert when they had a flat tire on the car. Getting out, the boyfriend was about to start changing it when he spotted a cowboy sitting on his horse rolling a smoke.
He told his girlfriend that he would make the cowboy change the tire and forher just to wait there.
"Hey parrrrtner" he mocked "Hows about you get down off of that horse and come over here and change this tire"
The cowboy continued to roll the smoke and ignored him
"Hey Shithead! I told you to get over here and change this tire or I'm gonna kick your ass!"
The cowboy looked at him and then said "I'll tell you what fella. I'm going to finish my smoke. Then I'm going to get down off my horse, kick your ass and make you change that tire. Then while I screw your girlfriend, I'm gonna make you hold my balls up out of the hot sand."
Later as they were driving on across the desert the girlfriend says "That cowboy was pretty tough wasn't he baby?"
"Naw he wasn't so tough!" said the guy "Did you see him flinch every time I dropped his balls in the hot sand?"
*******PARTY******AFTER ST. PATRICK'S MARDI GRAS BIRTHDAY PARTY SATURDAY MARCH 24th 8:00 NASHVILLE TN
Hey got any green? I'm referring to St. Patrick's Day green...what did you think I was talking about? Saturday March 24th, we thought we'd bring out the party staples of the drunk gummy bears, whip up some of those special recipe jello shots, add a few chocolate covered strawberries to the mix and bring them up to Nashville and throw one naughty of a After St. Patrick's Mardi Gras Birthday Party. So bring your green beads, bring your own bottle of favorite liquid encouragement and come out and party with us. We'll have an entire room designed for dancing and socializing. We'll have the hottest dance music anywhere around and karaoke for those wishing to serenade the horny leprechauns Jen will lead the icebreaker games and we'll have some small door prizes to give away plus we'll give away some prizes to those who collect the most beads throughout the evening. And just like every party, the private bedrooms will be busy with couples and single ladies getting naked and having lots of fun. A few of us are celebrating birthdays (yep we're one more year closer to taking over hell). 3 party themes. One big hell of a party and oh yeah Jen will have an exclusive surprise for you ladies that you'll want to try out before the party's over. Party so hot the leprechauns will be jizzing in the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Saturday March 24th 8:00 Nashville TN Email us at j.jones 7763@yahoo.com for more information.
This will be a motel party. Door donations are as follows: Couples-$15.00 bring a couple with you both get in for $10 each (Must arrive at the same time) Single Ladies-Free Single Males-$20.00 bring a couple with you get in for $15, couple gets in for $10
Party On
Corruptor and Jen
