Little Johnnies father has to come to school to talk to the teacher.
Teacher: 'Sir, I'm sorry, but your son does absolutely nothing at
school, he fails every subject!!'
Dad: 'Except for drawing, he's a very good drawer.'
Teacher: 'That's correct, last week he drew a tiger on the chalk board
and the kids were so frightened I couldn't get them to enter the classroom'
Dad: 'That's nothing, last month he drew a pussy on the stove,
I burned my dick three times!!'
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Jokes From The Phone
Did you know that the words "race car" spelled backwards still spells "race car"
that "eat" is the only word that if you take the first letter and move it to the last it spells its past tense "ate"
And have you noticed that if you rearrange the letters in "illegal immigrants" and add just a few more letters, it spells "go home you free-loading, benefit grabbing, resource-sucking, baby making, violent non-English speaking assholes and take those other hairy faced sandal wearing bomb-making camel riding goat loving raggedy ass bastards with you."
How weird is that?
Why do midgets laugh when they run?
Cause the grass tickles their nuts
Why are guys so good at video games?
It's the eye-hand coordination developed after all those years of jacking off
The hit and run victim was just getting to his feet when a policeman ran up to help.
"My mother in law just tried to run me over" the shaken man said
"The car hit you from behind" the officer said "How could you tell it was your mother in law"
Man replied "I recognized the laugh"
Wife comes home to find her husband fucking the dog in the living room. "My God Henry" she screas "I know you've had other woemn but this time you've gone too far"
"You may be right" he says "I think I'm stuck"
that "eat" is the only word that if you take the first letter and move it to the last it spells its past tense "ate"
And have you noticed that if you rearrange the letters in "illegal immigrants" and add just a few more letters, it spells "go home you free-loading, benefit grabbing, resource-sucking, baby making, violent non-English speaking assholes and take those other hairy faced sandal wearing bomb-making camel riding goat loving raggedy ass bastards with you."
How weird is that?
Why do midgets laugh when they run?
Cause the grass tickles their nuts
Why are guys so good at video games?
It's the eye-hand coordination developed after all those years of jacking off
The hit and run victim was just getting to his feet when a policeman ran up to help.
"My mother in law just tried to run me over" the shaken man said
"The car hit you from behind" the officer said "How could you tell it was your mother in law"
Man replied "I recognized the laugh"
Wife comes home to find her husband fucking the dog in the living room. "My God Henry" she screas "I know you've had other woemn but this time you've gone too far"
"You may be right" he says "I think I'm stuck"
Alternation X Joke Of The Day
Ernie says, "Dis is a 2 quart termos bottle."
Rich says, "Ya, I have to get me one."
That night Rich goes home, but forgets what it is called again. Well
Rich really wants one of these things. So he decides the next day when
he asks he's going to write it down so he remembers what it is.
The next day they are down in the mine working again and the noon
whistle blows for lunch and Ernie pulls out his thermos of hot coffee.
Rich looks at it and says, "Say, Ernie, vat you got dere?"
Well, by this time Ernie's getting pretty upset. Every day Rich asks
what it is and never remembers so he decides to just make up stuff
since
Rich isn't going to remember anyway.
So Ernie says, "Dis is a contraceptive."
Rich says, "Ya, I have to get me one." And he writes it down. That
night Rich is in the neighborhood drug store and the pharmacist sees
him
walking around and says to him, "Can I help you?"
Rich says, "Ya, I'd like a contraceptive."
And the pharmacist says, "Sure, what size?"
Rich says, "Give me da 2 quart size, I'll be working in da hole all day!"
Rich says, "Ya, I have to get me one."
That night Rich goes home, but forgets what it is called again. Well
Rich really wants one of these things. So he decides the next day when
he asks he's going to write it down so he remembers what it is.
The next day they are down in the mine working again and the noon
whistle blows for lunch and Ernie pulls out his thermos of hot coffee.
Rich looks at it and says, "Say, Ernie, vat you got dere?"
Well, by this time Ernie's getting pretty upset. Every day Rich asks
what it is and never remembers so he decides to just make up stuff
since
Rich isn't going to remember anyway.
So Ernie says, "Dis is a contraceptive."
Rich says, "Ya, I have to get me one." And he writes it down. That
night Rich is in the neighborhood drug store and the pharmacist sees
him
walking around and says to him, "Can I help you?"
Rich says, "Ya, I'd like a contraceptive."
And the pharmacist says, "Sure, what size?"
Rich says, "Give me da 2 quart size, I'll be working in da hole all day!"
DVD's Out Yesterday
Shutter Island Leonardo DiCaprio
From Paris With Love-John Travolta,Jonathan Rhys Meyers
The 41 Year Old Virgin Who Knocked Up Sarah Marshall and Felt Superbad About It-Bryan Callen,Noureen DeWulf,Mircea Monroe
Cry Of The Owl-Julia Stiles
Cop Dog-Corin Nemec, Cassi Thomas
From Paris With Love-John Travolta,Jonathan Rhys Meyers
The 41 Year Old Virgin Who Knocked Up Sarah Marshall and Felt Superbad About It-Bryan Callen,Noureen DeWulf,Mircea Monroe
Cry Of The Owl-Julia Stiles
Cop Dog-Corin Nemec, Cassi Thomas
New CD Releases Yesterday
Against Me-White Crosses
Christina Aguilera-Bionic
Dierks Bentley Up On The Ridge
AM Taxi-We Don't Stand A Chance
Cadalliac Sky-Letters In The Deep
Clay Walker-She Won't Be Lonely Long
Hanson-Shout It Out
Hot Hot Heat-Future Breeds
Jewel-Sweet and Wild
Lee Brice-Love Like Crazy
Lil Jon-Crunk Rock
Nevermore-Obsidian Conspiracy
Plies-Goon Affiliation
Rooney-Eureka
Saving Abel-Miss America
Christina Aguilera-Bionic
Dierks Bentley Up On The Ridge
AM Taxi-We Don't Stand A Chance
Cadalliac Sky-Letters In The Deep
Clay Walker-She Won't Be Lonely Long
Hanson-Shout It Out
Hot Hot Heat-Future Breeds
Jewel-Sweet and Wild
Lee Brice-Love Like Crazy
Lil Jon-Crunk Rock
Nevermore-Obsidian Conspiracy
Plies-Goon Affiliation
Rooney-Eureka
Saving Abel-Miss America
Monday, June 7, 2010
Corruptor's Calendar Of Swinger Parties
******BANGAROO*******Saturday night June 12th 8:00
Ladies that are participating so far. Dee from Crossville, Elizabeth from Smyrna, V from Shelbyville, hunny_beartn. Sandy from Manchester, Patricia from Monteagle I've got several on the bubble that I will be going back and talking to this week so as they confirm I will let you know.
Guys you need to email me. We got a very secure place in Nashville to hold this and we're going to put Bangaroo back on the map.
We're revamping Bangaroo to bring back the intense wall to wall sex marathon that put the event on the list of can't miss parties.
So come out and join the night of nothing but plain sex Bangaroo June 12th email me for the details
********JUNE BUG BOOGIE*****Weekend of Thursday night June 17th-Sunday June 20th.
I know there's several swingers that love to get on a bike and ride. But you don't need to necessarily have one in order to participate in June Bug Boogie. Saturday night, there's going to be a tent party so big, I would not be surprised if it's not the most talked about tent party of the event. Should I tell you why? Hmm....let's just say one of the features has to deal with a chain and the other....bring a camera I'm sure you'll get a picture of a pair of thongs hanging from a tree. Corruptor's ready for June Bug Boogie....let's get drunk, loud and proud as we celebrate one of the biggest and the very best biker rally in the whole state of Tennessee. $30 gets you in all three days or just one day whatever your speed. Partying it up right at the June Bug Boogie. Check out the site for all the details and main features http://www.junebugboogie.com
*******SWINGERS POOL PARTY*******Saturday night June 26th
Trust me there's going to be some new faces around the parties, and the new faces will start showing Saturday night June 26th. See , I've been behind the scenes talking to a bunch of ladies who don't necessarily have access to the internet. and well, Saturday night June 26th, I'm inviting all of them to come get naked with me in a swimming pool in Murfreesboro. Oh yeah all you couples and single ladies are welcome to jump in as well. I think some of these ladies will also be making good use of the bedroom areas too...I don't know something just tells me that. So help me welcome in several new faces as we build the party crowd and get the parties back to the Corruptor's Five Star Stamp Of Approval status email ladybugkiss68 at yahoo.com if you want to go
*********ALTERNATIONX-CLARKSVILLE MOTEL PARTY-Saturday Night July 10th
The month of July brings the Sexiest Modeling Competition series throughout the state of Tennessee. You shot off the fireworks already. Now it's time to keep the action blazing hot as Alternation-X hosts it's very first motel party in Clarksville TN. I got three ladies that are helping me with this venture and I figure why not throw this out there. We are wanting to find the sexiest dressed woman in the Clarksville Ft Campbell and Kentucky area and we want you ladies to come out bring a few outfits (up to three each) and we are going to vote and let you know which outfit looks the best on you. Then after the modeling is over with, we are going to vote on the overall best dressed of the night and award a prize to the top 3 ladies. Here's my challenge though....Corruptor challenges 20 women to come participate. If that happens, I'll throw a dress on and model it to the point to where you can take pictures how about that?
So get those outfits together, bring your lady friends and let's find out who is the sexiest dressed woman of the Clarksville area.
*********COOKEVILLE MOTEL PARTY-Saturday night July 17th
The Sexiest Modeling Competition series continues as we find out the sexiest dressed in the Upper Cumberland. Once again my challenge is out there just like it was in Clarksville. Don't be shy. If we have twenty women single or married that participate in the contest. I will throw a dress on and model it for the pictures. Couples, single ladies and select single guys welcome. The month of July will be hotter than the weather outside Saturday night July 17th starting at 8:00 p.m. Participating ladies can get to the motel for the registration process by 6:00
******ALTERNATIONX-CHATTANOOGA MOTEL PARTY Saturday Night July 24th
I'm going to have help with this party and if everything goes right it will be a true motel social takeover. We'll find out who the Sexiest dressed in Chattanooga and the Georgia State Line is. (don't know if I'll do that guaranteed thing or not cause getting my picture taken in two outfits is enough right?...) Couples, Single Ladies and Single guys are more than welcome to attend this party as we kick off the Chattanooga Motel Parties Saturday night July 24th 8:00 CST 9:00 EST. We'll get you more information closer to the date.
*************SEXIEST DRESSED SWIMSUIT PARTY SATURDAY NIGHT JULY 31st*******
Murfreesboro, Middle Tennessee it's finally your turn to find out which lady is out there as the sexiest swimsuit party is on.
Come dressed in your skimpiest, sexiest swimsuit and we'll award a prize to the best three. Here's an incentive. 20 women show up at this party and participate. Corruptor will throw on a swimsuit as well. Plus let's get all Hollywood and for those that can do this, come join in our group of women in the pool picture (not mandatory to participate or attend for that matter) Let's get these parties back on the map Saturday Night July 31st. Promise you the pool will not be the only thing that's wet! Oh and by the way we're going to be celebrating someone's birthday that night too
Ladies that are participating so far. Dee from Crossville, Elizabeth from Smyrna, V from Shelbyville, hunny_beartn. Sandy from Manchester, Patricia from Monteagle I've got several on the bubble that I will be going back and talking to this week so as they confirm I will let you know.
Guys you need to email me. We got a very secure place in Nashville to hold this and we're going to put Bangaroo back on the map.
We're revamping Bangaroo to bring back the intense wall to wall sex marathon that put the event on the list of can't miss parties.
So come out and join the night of nothing but plain sex Bangaroo June 12th email me for the details
********JUNE BUG BOOGIE*****Weekend of Thursday night June 17th-Sunday June 20th.
I know there's several swingers that love to get on a bike and ride. But you don't need to necessarily have one in order to participate in June Bug Boogie. Saturday night, there's going to be a tent party so big, I would not be surprised if it's not the most talked about tent party of the event. Should I tell you why? Hmm....let's just say one of the features has to deal with a chain and the other....bring a camera I'm sure you'll get a picture of a pair of thongs hanging from a tree. Corruptor's ready for June Bug Boogie....let's get drunk, loud and proud as we celebrate one of the biggest and the very best biker rally in the whole state of Tennessee. $30 gets you in all three days or just one day whatever your speed. Partying it up right at the June Bug Boogie. Check out the site for all the details and main features http://www.junebugboogie.com
*******SWINGERS POOL PARTY*******Saturday night June 26th
Trust me there's going to be some new faces around the parties, and the new faces will start showing Saturday night June 26th. See , I've been behind the scenes talking to a bunch of ladies who don't necessarily have access to the internet. and well, Saturday night June 26th, I'm inviting all of them to come get naked with me in a swimming pool in Murfreesboro. Oh yeah all you couples and single ladies are welcome to jump in as well. I think some of these ladies will also be making good use of the bedroom areas too...I don't know something just tells me that. So help me welcome in several new faces as we build the party crowd and get the parties back to the Corruptor's Five Star Stamp Of Approval status email ladybugkiss68 at yahoo.com if you want to go
*********ALTERNATIONX-CLARKSVILLE MOTEL PARTY-Saturday Night July 10th
The month of July brings the Sexiest Modeling Competition series throughout the state of Tennessee. You shot off the fireworks already. Now it's time to keep the action blazing hot as Alternation-X hosts it's very first motel party in Clarksville TN. I got three ladies that are helping me with this venture and I figure why not throw this out there. We are wanting to find the sexiest dressed woman in the Clarksville Ft Campbell and Kentucky area and we want you ladies to come out bring a few outfits (up to three each) and we are going to vote and let you know which outfit looks the best on you. Then after the modeling is over with, we are going to vote on the overall best dressed of the night and award a prize to the top 3 ladies. Here's my challenge though....Corruptor challenges 20 women to come participate. If that happens, I'll throw a dress on and model it to the point to where you can take pictures how about that?
So get those outfits together, bring your lady friends and let's find out who is the sexiest dressed woman of the Clarksville area.
*********COOKEVILLE MOTEL PARTY-Saturday night July 17th
The Sexiest Modeling Competition series continues as we find out the sexiest dressed in the Upper Cumberland. Once again my challenge is out there just like it was in Clarksville. Don't be shy. If we have twenty women single or married that participate in the contest. I will throw a dress on and model it for the pictures. Couples, single ladies and select single guys welcome. The month of July will be hotter than the weather outside Saturday night July 17th starting at 8:00 p.m. Participating ladies can get to the motel for the registration process by 6:00
******ALTERNATIONX-CHATTANOOGA MOTEL PARTY Saturday Night July 24th
I'm going to have help with this party and if everything goes right it will be a true motel social takeover. We'll find out who the Sexiest dressed in Chattanooga and the Georgia State Line is. (don't know if I'll do that guaranteed thing or not cause getting my picture taken in two outfits is enough right?...) Couples, Single Ladies and Single guys are more than welcome to attend this party as we kick off the Chattanooga Motel Parties Saturday night July 24th 8:00 CST 9:00 EST. We'll get you more information closer to the date.
*************SEXIEST DRESSED SWIMSUIT PARTY SATURDAY NIGHT JULY 31st*******
Murfreesboro, Middle Tennessee it's finally your turn to find out which lady is out there as the sexiest swimsuit party is on.
Come dressed in your skimpiest, sexiest swimsuit and we'll award a prize to the best three. Here's an incentive. 20 women show up at this party and participate. Corruptor will throw on a swimsuit as well. Plus let's get all Hollywood and for those that can do this, come join in our group of women in the pool picture (not mandatory to participate or attend for that matter) Let's get these parties back on the map Saturday Night July 31st. Promise you the pool will not be the only thing that's wet! Oh and by the way we're going to be celebrating someone's birthday that night too
Corruptor's Joke Of the Day
Things To Do With A Detachable Penis
1. Take it for a ride on its very own set of training wheels.
2. Slip it into a bun and give new meaning to "Hot Dog."
3. Wave it in front of John Bobbitt and scream "She's at it again!"
4. Use it to test water depth.
5. Use it to test water temperature.
6. Throw it on the ground and watch as passerby scream in horror and
disgust (or gasp in awe).
7. Use it as a temporary replacement for a vibrator, until you get
new batteries.
8. Use it as a floatation device.
9. Use it to demonstrate how to put on a condom in sex education
classes.
10. Use it as the tee in a golf game.
11. Use it as a stirrer for coffee (or tea) when a spoon isn't
available.
12. Use it as a Christmas ornament (best done if decorated with green
and red glitter).
13. Use it to teach your dog to play fetch.
14. Keep it as a reminder of why you chose to be celibate.
15. Use it as a lucky charm.
16. Use it as a substitute for cigarettes to help ease your craving.
17. Use it as a vacuum hose attachment.
18. Use it as a pacifier for your "significant other."
19. Use it as a chew toy for your dog.
20. Use it as a scratching post for your cat.
1. Take it for a ride on its very own set of training wheels.
2. Slip it into a bun and give new meaning to "Hot Dog."
3. Wave it in front of John Bobbitt and scream "She's at it again!"
4. Use it to test water depth.
5. Use it to test water temperature.
6. Throw it on the ground and watch as passerby scream in horror and
disgust (or gasp in awe).
7. Use it as a temporary replacement for a vibrator, until you get
new batteries.
8. Use it as a floatation device.
9. Use it to demonstrate how to put on a condom in sex education
classes.
10. Use it as the tee in a golf game.
11. Use it as a stirrer for coffee (or tea) when a spoon isn't
available.
12. Use it as a Christmas ornament (best done if decorated with green
and red glitter).
13. Use it to teach your dog to play fetch.
14. Keep it as a reminder of why you chose to be celibate.
15. Use it as a lucky charm.
16. Use it as a substitute for cigarettes to help ease your craving.
17. Use it as a vacuum hose attachment.
18. Use it as a pacifier for your "significant other."
19. Use it as a chew toy for your dog.
20. Use it as a scratching post for your cat.
Corruptor's Top New Songs To Be Listening For
1. Alice In Chains-Lesson Learned
2. Breaking Benjamin-Lights Out
3. Weezer-Trippin Down The Freeway
4. Danny Gokey-I Will Not Say Goodbye
5. Randy Rogers Band-Too Late For Goodbye
6. Steel Magnolia-Just By Being You
7. Five For Fighting-Slice
8. Jessie James-Boys In the Summer
9. T.I.-Got Your Back
10. Usher-Hey Daddy
11. Barenaked Ladies-Every Subway Car
12. Cowboy Junkies-Stranger Here
13. Goo Goo Dolls-Home
14. Oasis-Whatever
15. Filter-Inevitable Relapse
2. Breaking Benjamin-Lights Out
3. Weezer-Trippin Down The Freeway
4. Danny Gokey-I Will Not Say Goodbye
5. Randy Rogers Band-Too Late For Goodbye
6. Steel Magnolia-Just By Being You
7. Five For Fighting-Slice
8. Jessie James-Boys In the Summer
9. T.I.-Got Your Back
10. Usher-Hey Daddy
11. Barenaked Ladies-Every Subway Car
12. Cowboy Junkies-Stranger Here
13. Goo Goo Dolls-Home
14. Oasis-Whatever
15. Filter-Inevitable Relapse
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