Friday, October 23, 2009

AlternationX Joke Of The Day

The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman and, was somewhat upset. "You're a disrespectful pig," she cried!" "How dare you do this to me, a faithful wife, and the mother of your children! I'm leaving you and I want a divorce right away!"

The husband thought a moment and replied: "Hang on just a minute love, so at least I can tell you what happened."

"Fine, go ahead," she sobbed, "but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!"

The husband began:

"Well, I was getting into the car to drive home and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days!

"So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments.

"Since she needed a good clean up I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I threw them away. Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't use because you say they are too tight. I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't use because I don't have good taste.

"I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't wear just to annoy her and, I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don't use because someone at work has a pair the same."

The husband took a quick breath and continued, "She was so grateful for my understanding and help and, as I walked her to the door she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said: Please, do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?" ...